Tinky Winky on Jerry Falwell

The following is an editorial that was said to run on the New York Times but was retracted by its writer

Jerry Falwell
By Tinky Winky

A few weeks ago the reverend Jerry Falwell passed away leaving an space difficult to fill by the current crop of crazy conservative and homophobic white males out there. His remarks were a boost to our ratings and merchandise. It also allowed us to tap into a new market (gays) and introduced new products (the tinky winky vibrator, La las purse of pleasure and Po's furry whip) which sold exceptionally well.

Jerry questioned my sexual orientation as an entertainer. His remarks were irrational and scandalous. The equivalent of stating the length of the Popes’ penis (by the way 7 inches).

I did not take this personally. After all I am gay and so are the other teletubbies. Yet our sexual orientation has nothing to deal with entertainment that we provide children. No one questioned The Wiggles when they started their show. Their show is even more blatantly gay than ours! Their character, Captain Feathersword is proof enough. Jerry couldn’t pick on them since those four guys would have shown up at his house and kicked his bigoted ass. No, Jerry had to pick on my purpleness and my triangle to appear to be straight and hide his obvious homosexuality.

Now that Jerry has passed away I hope that he is in a restfull and peaceful place where he can be sodomized by 10 inch cartoon-like penises. Whether that is heaven or hell for Jerry…only he will know.